The Perfect Crime

[o1vk4iN6]

This kind of reminds me of one of the psychopaths from the movie seven psychopaths. The one with the throat slitting, it's a bit more twisted though.

[Cheraphy]

Some day I want to get two friends together with me and find some random schmuck to target. One by one we'd walk up to him, seemingly at random, hours apart and each say one line before walking away, disappearing into the crowds. "None of this is real." "this is all a dream."; "please wake up."

[Manga]

What's all this talk about perfect murders... did someone fall asleep to Nick Cave again?

[BHX]

ModShop wrote:

I've determined the perfect way to kill someone. It doesn't matter who knows that you did it, you could never be convicted. All you have to do is learn to play the violin and follow your victim around 24/7 and play really sad music until they get so depressed that they kill themselves. This is going on my bucket list.

If they commit suicide you wouldn't be killing them though. You are also wrong in another aspect, they could charge you still as it would be assisted-suicide.

Assisted suicide is when one or more individuals help another person commit suicide, i.e. directly, intentionally, and voluntarily cause his or her own death. "Assistance" may mean providing one with the means (drugs or equipment) to end one's own life, but may extend to other actions.

[ModShop]

That's provided that they can prove that my music was the cause. If you wanted to go into the actual legality of this then the "murder" would be stopped as soon as I step into their home or a bathroom stall with them, or really whenever they decide enough is enough.

[N36fSL3A]

How would that sound in a court? Their spouse claims they hate your music and killed their themselves 'cause of it? That's just silly.

[Dy7SLyTq]

thats 'merica fred

[LB]

Am I missing something here? Lumpkin's name is Antoine, so who is this 'fred' you speak of? I've seen multiple people call him fred on multiple occasions o_o

[N36fSL3A]

Well Fredbill was my last account, I thought y'all knew.

[twiggystardust]

because his old name on here was Fredbill30, he made a post about being banned like a week or so ago

[BHX]

ModShop wrote:

That's provided that they can prove that my music was the cause. If you wanted to go into the actual legality of this then the "murder" would be stopped as soon as I step into their home or a bathroom stall with them, or really whenever they decide enough is enough.

That is true, but you have to remember one detail about most suicides. Historically, most suicides leave suicide notes which can implicate the person(s) or item(s) that drove them to suicide. There are the rare cases where they just commit suicide without leaving a single detail, but this is rare from what I recall from my criminology class in high school.

[Manga]

I actually saw that they banned your account Fred. Shame on them making you enter the witness protection program and changing your name and all.

Now the best way to kill someone, and this is proven, is how the tabacco industry does it. How many people have they gotten away with killing?

[jwkNwA7f]

@Manga a lot.

[3qX21hU5]

How are the Tobacco companies at fault for killing people?

Instead of blaming the company might as well let the person take responsibility for their own actions. The person chooses to smoke he isn't forced into smoking (Specially for the amount of time it usually takes to die from it).

Are car companies at fault for all the deaths from car accidents? Because without cars there would be no car accidents. Same could go for Liquor companies, Gun Companies, Knife Companies, Boat Companies, Electrical Companies, and on and on ;p.

[jwkNwA7f]

@Zereo I wasn't blaming the company. I meant as the result of them making the product, it has killed a lot of people. I do agree it is the person's fault for getting them in the first place and for keep doing it after that too.

[N36fSL3A]

Here in 'murica it's always someone's other than our fault. :P

Seriously though it isn't they're fault. It's whoever smoke's fault.

[Disch]

No, no, guys... the perfect crime is to collaborate with rating agencies to hike up the value of assets you know to be worthless, thereby artificially bolstering the housing market allowing both the housing prices and the interest rate on loans to be much higher than they should be. This acts as sort of a syphon pulling money from the middle class and gets them into debts they won't possibly be able to pay back. Then when they default, you simply take back the collateral with additional money in hand.

For the coup de gras, when the scheme can't sustain itself any longer and the market finally collapses, you simply convince the government it wasn't your fault... that "everyone was doing it" and that to save the situation they need to give you billions more dollars for free.

You can then proceed to spend that billions of dollars on bonuses for your corrupt executive staff, and on gambling investing to boost income... all while proceeding to withhold reasonable loan opportunities from families which need them the most. If you're really clever you can even purchase/absorb smaller banks to gain a bit more of the market share.


The beautiful thing about it is that even though you nearly destroyed the world economy and literally ruined thousands and thousands of lives.... you won't ever get caught. And even if you do, jail time is an impossibility. The worst that will happen to you is you'll get fined for a fraction of a percent of the money you swindled.

And the best part? People won't stay mad at you. In fact virtually none of the people who bank with you will take their money out... and more people will willingly open accounts and literally hand you their money. It doesn't matter how hard you burn them... they'll still trust you somehow.

Then in 8 or so years when everyone's forgotten what you've done, and it's no longer in news headlines... you can go right back to doing it again.



Flawless.



PS: anyone that has their money with an investment bank is a jackass.

[devonrevenge]

I think the fast food industry gets away with the most 4th degree murder.

Something so available and tasty shouldn't be quite so deadly, they should let you guys have drugs, if you can choose what you eat then you should choose what you snort smoke and shoot in your veins.

Ive been thinking in investing in a company that produces insulin, there will be a money maker there for a while or at least till they cure it.

[Disch]

devonrevenge wrote:

fast food [snip] tasty

Wat?

I have yet to eat fastfood that does not taste like garbage.

People that think it's tasty are just familiar with it and/or have never actually eaten tasty food.

[3qX21hU5]

Hey now I think Mcdonalds has some of the best fries I have ever tasted ;p and I don't really mind their burgers either and I have ate at some pretty fancy restaurant's in my lifetime ;p

Now granted their food doesn't take like a $100 steak or anything but it still isn't bad in my opinion.